What would Kobe do?

I stumbled upon a goldmine lately, and I've been consuming it like it's candy from a candy shop. I don't know why I'd use candy as an example here, seeing as I totally detest candy — Häagen-Dazs is my Achilles heel. I digress.

So what's this goldmine? It’s a collection of Kobe Bryant interviews. In one of them, the interviewer asks him: "There are two kinds of players — those who love to win, and those who hate to lose. Which one are you?" Kobe replies, "Neither."

"Huh??" I retort. My head jerking up from the dishes I’m cleaning up. I need to be sure I heard right. I swear even the interviewer is taken aback.

I couldn't understand how one of the greatest basketball players ever neither hated to lose nor loved to win. My next thought was, "Bruh, whatever explanation is coming had better make sense." And it did.

Kobe's philosophy is that you're only losing if you give up or stop. When you lose, your weaknesses get exposed, and you have something specific to work on. Yes, it sucks to lose, but there are answers in there you can sit with.

The best part? Even when you win, it's the exact same process. At the end of the day, winning or losing isn’t quite the point — getting up the next day and going again is. Find what worked and why. Find what didn't and why. You take the feedback, you get better, and you go again. This short (from another interview) sums it up perfectly.

A chance to practice

This week, I tried something and I failed — woefully. The kind of failure that makes you question yourself and lands you in a small existential crisis. My friends and family think I exaggerate when I talk about failure, but trust me, I'm not. This event is actually what sent me down the Kobe rabbit hole in the first place.

Today, I was offered a chance to hear, in detail, exactly where I went wrong. My first instinct was to ignore the offer and move on. I'd already done my own analysis. I knew what went wrong and had started working on those areas. Did I really need to sit through someone walking me through my failures? So embarrassing. If they wanted to give feedback, couldn't they just send it in text? 🤦🏾‍♀️

Then I asked myself: what would Kobe do?

He'd take the call regardless of having done his own analysis. He'd want to compare notes. He'd want the blind spots he couldn't see on his own. So I said yes.

Failure sucks no doubt. And a week ago, I'd have spent way more time sulking than I will today, and that in itself is progress. My framing is better now: failure means I have somewhere specific to channel my focus and energies.

I've also been learning about the Mamba mentality watching Kobe's videos, and I can't wait to write all about it and where I'm applying it in my life.

Thanks for reading, amigo. Have a great weekend.