aybee

Latest posts from Diary of a silli-mazing human

• Why Culture May Be Your Biggest Weapon Yet

  Dec 05 ⎯ When I was in primary school (Year 3, if I remember correctly), we learned about culture. We had to chant the definition until it practically lived in our heads. The teacher would yell, “What is culture?” and we would chorus, “Culture is the way of life of a people.” The first thing that struck me was that odd phrase: a people. My tiny brain could not compute. “A” is singular, “people” is plural. English was fighting for its life that day. And of course, being the curious child that I was, I asked my teacher who calmly explained that “a people” meant “a group of people.” Ah. That made sense. And from that moment, I absolutely overused "a people" any chance I got. Anyways, today’s piece isn’t about all the ways I tormented my teachers. It’s about culture. And before we begin, let’s just say I’ve been looking forward to writing you all week. And by you, I mean my subscribers. If you’re reading this and you aren’t subscribed… well… you can still join us. Hehe. Why culture? On Friday mornings, I open my laptop and write about whatever’s on my mind. Sometimes it reflects my week; other times it’s just something I’m itching to rant about. This week, it’s culture. If you’ve been following me, you’d recall that at Metrifox, we’re foodies. At this point, I’m convinced I need to add “must have a healthy relationship with food” to our hiring requirements. No one can survive here otherwise 😅 Every Thursday, a workflow runs on our #lunch-orders channel. Everyone gets to order what they want delivered to them for lunch the next day. I started this after we went live, partly to appreciate my team, but also to reinforce something important: I want to build a company where people feel seen, appreciated, and cared for. I didn’t realize how much impact this tiny gesture would have. They started doing some really funny stuff like someone deciding to order what the next person orders, and that next person choosing to order the least desirable thing, so they could laugh at the utter ridiculousness of anyone letting someone else decide their lunch. Or is it how they are constantly getting inspiration for the next week from what other people ordered? I’d just sit there in a corner, sheepishly grinning while scrolling through their orders, having absolutely no idea what half of them were. Like… what in the world is a cheesemelt sub? The Unexpected During a recent Friday meeting, someone mentioned that the lunch tradition had massively improved their joy at work. Everyone agreed. They were excited about the meals, the shared laughs, the experiments, the bonding, and most importantly—being appreciated. I sat there stunned. It wasn’t the food. It was the feeling. The feeling of home. The feeling of ease. The feeling of “Wow, I really enjoy working here.” A simple weekly gesture had reinforced our culture of appreciation without a policy, a memo, or a lecture. This is what we do here: We appreciate. We honour excellence. We give credit. We show care. Building Culture Culture doesn’t just fall from the sky. You have to build it; brick by brick, choice by choice, action by action. If your foundation is straw, you cannot expect to raise a mansion. Culture is the same: if you want “this is how we do things here” to stick, you must model it consistently. Want a culture of appreciation? Appreciate people. Want honest feedback? Give honest feedback consistently. Want trust? Demonstrate trust. Culture is not vibes. It's reinforced behavior; and as a parent, I see this play out at home every single day. I recently learned about Michael Easter’s 2% Rule. It says that only 2% of people choose the harder path for long-term gain when an easier option exists. In other words, only 2% take the stairs when there’s an elevator. Jeez. I live on the first floor. Why the hell was I taking the elevator? So I started taking the stairs. My kids still took the elevator… for two days. Then, without me saying anything, they started following me. My son eagerly, my daughter dramatically. On rainy days when it’s really cold, she still takes the elevator—and guess what? That’s okay. Culture isn’t instant. Steven Bartlett put this really nicely 👇🏿 If the culture is strong enough, the new people become the culture. If the culture is weak, the culture becomes like the new people. Another Example Did you notice something seemingly unrelated in the Slack screenshots I shared? Hehe.... Our display photos! They're avatars! When I created our Slack workspace, I set my display photo as an avatar. It was deliberate: I wanted the “We’re professional, but we don’t do stiff or overly formal here” kind of vibe. For me, it was important to build a culture where people didn’t feel the need to be too official. I wanted us to focus on the most important thing, which was building stuff, without sacrificing the fun along the way. I never asked anyone to follow suit. Yet, they did. Solomon joined us this week as an intern, and I reminded him to upload a photo. Lo and behold Solomon! My 2 cents If you want things done a certain way, words are not your greatest weapon. A one-off action is not your greatest weapon. A PowerPoint presentation is definitely not your greatest weapon. Your greatest weapon is culture. And culture is built by one thing: consistent action. You lead by doing. You model the behavior you want. You repeat it long enough that it becomes the norm. If you want kids to clean their rooms, show them by keeping yours clean. Ermmmm… maybe that’s not a great example. If it’s working for your child, please let me know 🫣 But still, the point stands: culture is your strongest lever. And while it takes effort to build, it pays off in ways you do not expect. That’s it for today! Have a great weekend amigos… and…. 'til next time 🫡

  

• The counterfeit currency of being liked

  Nov 28 ⎯ Finally, we’re here and I’m fulfilling a 2 week-old promise 💃🏽 I said I’d write about this, and yes, you’re welcome… hehe. A question for you! Have you ever heard about the Abilene Paradox? Let me rephrase: Have you ever had that “WTF look” because a friend expressed their disdain for something to you in private and then in public, went all “Yaaas, Queen!” to it? 😂 You’re there like, “Huh? What just happened?” Or… maybe you’re that friend. 😬 I know, I know! You had your reasons. We all do. The Abilene Paradox The Abilene Paradox is when a group ends up making a decision that almost nobody wants; simply because each person assumes the others want it. I don’t want to go to the beach, but I assume everyone else does. They don’t want to go either, but they assume I do. We all show up… sand in our shoes and resentment in our hearts. Not because anyone forced us, but because nobody wanted to “rock the boat.” Another example: Thomas invites Alba to his party (my friend Alba will kill me for using her name 😂) Not because he wants her there, but because he thinks she wants to be there. Alba shows up; not because she wants to go, but because she thinks Thomas wants her there. Two miserable humans with zero bravery. We don’t want to be the odd one out, so we go as far as stating support for an outcome we do not even want. That brings me to the question I asked my 7-year-old yesterday. He was worried that other kids’ parents wouldn’t see the email about not wearing uniforms; and then, he’d be the only one without one. My question to him was simple: What’s so bad about being the odd one out? The Fundamental Desire to be Liked We see this in kids - they feel bad when they’re not invited to that party, or when a group of kids are playing and don’t ask them to join. They run home excited to tell the story when someone approaches them to be friends, or everyone at school that day wanted to race them. It’s a euphoric feeling! “Oh, I’m now part of the group!”. It feels like something worth celebrating. Oh! A natural high. It does seem like this is innate in us. Some would even argue that a “sense of belonging” is one of the core needs for human survival. And without it, humans could literally die. But from where I’m sitting? It seems like many adults are addicted to social approval. I know people who stay in religious organizations they don’t believe in anymore; not because they want to, but because leaving means losing friends, being alienated, and “starting over.” They equate that loss to death, and so they stay. I could understand that if it were coming from a kid. However, we’re not kids anymore. And I argue that even kids benefit from hearing, “It’s okay to be the odd one out.” every now and then. If “group acceptance” is a need for human survival, then, my follow-up question would be “at what cost?”. At some point, you’re not living; you’re performing. And if you’re performing… is that even life? At what cost? Life eventually presents us with choices, big ones. And each path comes with a cost. Most people choose the path that keeps them safe within the group, and a brave few choose the path that keeps them true to themselves. Don’t get it twisted! Sometimes “the group” is society, and “What will people say?” becomes the chief decision-maker. I don’t care which path you choose (okay, maybe I do, and that’s why I’m writing). But let’s be honest, what truly is the cost of choosing acceptance over authenticity? You lose original thinking. You lose your convictions and values (did you really have them to begin with?). You lose personal identity. The people who accept you? They’re accepting a counterfeit version of you. Which means their acceptance is counterfeit too; because it depends on your performance. At some point, you have to ask yourself if you’re here to truly live, or just want to continue the act for the rest of your life. “But I don’t want to be the Bad Guy” I’ve heard the above statement a lot and honestly, I think at this point, we have to redefine what the “bad guy” means. These days, it means “the person who’s thinking contrary to others”. Like, how can saying no to something you don’t want, or stating your true opinions, make you bad? 🤦🏾‍♀️ It just makes you honest! You’d hear people say “I knew that was a terrible idea, but I just kept quiet so as not to be the bad guy”. Spoiler alert: You are the bad guy. Keeping quiet made you the bad guy. Lying made you the bad guy. Dishonesty made you the bad guy. You’d often find this if you lead companies or teams. Teammates saying “I knew this design made no sense, but I didn’t want to be the bad guy, so I kept quiet”. Sir. Ma’am. You are the bad guy 🌚 There’s another layer to this I think I’ve also come across a lot, even with myself. People don’t want to be wrong! And because of that, they’d rather keep quiet. If I’m wrong, then I’ll look stupid. If I look stupid, then no one will like me. Wait, are we right back at acceptance? I’m constantly learning that it’s okay to be wrong, and that should never stop me from voicing my opinions. It’s hard sometimes, but we can all try. Practice saying “Ah! I was wrong about that, I see it now”. Try it for 7 days straight, it works wonders I assure you 🙃 Being wrong means you learn, and you get wiser. Accepting it means you give others the permission to be comfortable with being wrong also. Now, how’s that for a reward for being the “bad guy”? Hard Decisions I won’t pretend I don’t struggle with decisions. I do. We all do. But I’ve learned to ask myself why a decision feels hard. Is it hard because it will hurt someone you love? Because you’ll lose favour? Because you’re used to being the “good guy”? Because you hate confrontation? Because you want to be liked? If the answer leads back to “I don’t want to lose acceptance,” and not “this is the right thing for a greater good,” then you know exactly what to do. Some things won’t be worth it in the long run. So, live, don’t perform! Ah, that sounded like a good quote 😅 Live life, don’t perform! Abiodun Olowode, November 28, 2025 Maybe it’s letting go of someone in your company (even if everyone loves them). Maybe it’s ending a relationship. Maybe it’s standing up for yourself. Whatever it is, if you know it’s the right thing, forget being liked. Be brave and do the thing. It pays off. Recovering Your True Self I’ve struggled with many decisions in the past, but every time I chose the path that ensured I didn’t lose my true self, even though painful at the time because I feared losing love? I grew! Ten fold! What did I gain? Peace of mind. A clear conscience. Pride when I looked in the mirror. And the people who were in my life? I was sure they loved me for who I was and that was enough. You can start by: Stating Your Opinions People may disagree. That’s fine. But at least they know where you stand. You can go along with something you disagree with, and this is called the disagree and commit principle. However, it’s very different from false agreement. Not Going Where You’d Rather Not Be Your bed is a beautiful place. Feel free to sleep. If you don’t want to be somewhere, and it’s not the right place for you, don’t go. Seek self-validation first Ask yourself: Does doing this make me respect myself more or less? Choose the path that lets you admire who you see in the mirror. I know today’s piece may read like a rant (maybe it is). But I’m sure there’s some truth in it. Take what resonates, and trash the rest. I’m just stating my opinions, while encouraging you to do same 😂 The End? If you read my work often, you’re probably thinking, “Why isn’t she quoting an ex-colleague today?” hehe Errrm… do I have something? Ah! Looks like I do (sorry to disappoint you 🫣) Someone I wasn’t afraid to tell last year that he was an addict, proudly told me this week, without me asking that he quit smoking 👇🏾 I’m not saying go out there spraying your opinions on people, or being a dick and shouting, “AB said I could.” Please, I did not send you anywhere 🙏🏾 All I said was… Actually—I forget (scratches head) Feel free to read the piece again 🤪 Til’ next week, adios amigos ❤️

  

• We Love Pain! (Seriously?)

  Nov 21 ⎯ Hey, before you crucify me, let me crucify myself ☠ Yes, I know: in my last piece, I said this week, we’d talk about the counterfeit currency of being liked. And yet here you are, staring at a post about pain 😬 How dare I? I promise I’m not a fraud 😂 Over the last few days, I’ve been hit with a flurry of emotions — mountain-high highs and gut‑punch lows, that pushed me to see pain in a completely new light. When I sat down to write this morning, it felt selfish not to share this shift in perspective with you, especially because it’s already bringing me massive clarity. And as the benevolent soul that I am, here I am talking to you about… pain. No need to thank me. What am I here for? You’re welcome 😇 The “We love Pain” Slogan I worked at Factorial for three years and in 2023, during our Christmas party, one of the cofounders had us yell: “We love Pain!”. This wasn’t a new slogan — anyone who’d been around the company for a while would know it. The first time I heard it, my reaction was: “You and who, please?”. I don’t love pain. I love the soft life. As Nigerians would say: “I did not come to this life to suffer.” Why on earth would anyone love pain? Funny enough, I was chatting with an ex-colleague last Friday (yes, I know this seems to be a recurring theme in my posts. Please, it’s not my fault you ghost everyone you ever worked with when you leave… or is it the other way round? 🌚). He casually made reference to it. You see, pain could actually equal coins. You just need to see it the right way. The PainCoinful End of My Week So, this week, at Metrifox, a business began a 14-day free trial. They transferred their customer data (a few for a start), and set up their features and offerings. They also set up entitlements for several plans so we would help them track usage, and bill their customers. I was elated! Elated is an understatement. I was over the moon. The only thing I didn’t do was my catwalk dance (don’t ask, just move on). They quickly began to give feedback on a few extra functionalities that could smoothen their workflow, nothing too serious. As at yesterday, checking the back-office, they had 35 customers and had processed 18 orders. Not bad at all for someone who’s on trial And then… the pain began. We begin to receive pings on our error monitoring channel. What’s happening? I check the server, and 😳 Where’s my database? Rails, what do you mean you couldn’t find my database? It definitely wasn’t stolen. While I’m figuring things out, I check my phone. The client had pinged us to ask why the app was slow. I apologize and say we’re looking into it, but in reality, I’m maybe freaking out. Why? Thanks for asking. Because, I had just caught a glimpse of what the issue could have been, considering our queue processes were dying too. Mind you, it had nothing to do with his 35 customers and 18 orders 😅 Anyways, I restart the pod, we increase the memory for our queues, and… phew!… the app comes back online. But the underlying problem? Let’s just say it left me in premium tears. I’ll spare you the full technical jargon, but the bottom line: we may have to extract a part of the app into its own service. It’s not critical to the core app in terms of functionality and client interaction, but it’s the most memory-hungry part of what we do. If you know me, you’d know I dislike microservices. I love to go the path of a monolith until I don’t have a choice, and I’m not the only one. Someone was so upset by microservices they had to write about why it’s bad for your mental health. Just thinking about that option had me in severe pain 😂 We’re at a point where companies are signing up, and hitting us up for demos. “This is the last thing I need”, I thought to myself. I was wrong In reality though, thinking about it later, this is exactly what I need. This is the best time for this to have happened. Going through this now, and solving this problem (no matter how painful implementing the optimal solution could be), would further make our app resilient, keep us grounded and me?, I’d learn a ton more. Do you know what else would happen? That pain would turn into coins. Hehe. More resilience means more trust, happier customers, and ultimately, more revenue. I may have gone to bed dreading the next few days, but I woke up today genuinely excited for them. Count your coins Whatever pain you’re going through can be reframed. Whatever seems so difficult right now, you can ask yourself: what’s the light at the end of the tunnel? Begin to get excited about that light, not depressed about the pain. Make up your mind to put in the work required to get you to that end so you can count your coins baby! 💰 Mind you, the client pinged me last night to say they were moving to the next phase of their integration: migrating their customer subscriptions to our platform. Looks like it wasn’t so bad after all Anyways, amigos, talk to you next week. And…. don’t forget to stay counting 👋🏾

  

• Maybe you're just a necessary evil 🤷🏽‍♀️

  Nov 14 ⎯ The conversation that made me smile all day On Monday this week, as soon as I woke up, I remembered that my extended family had agreed over the weekend to contribute some money towards a specific project. I immediately sent my share to my brother, who is basically the family’s unofficial tax collector. A few seconds later, I received a WhatsApp message from him 👇🏾 He could have chosen to send a generic message saying he received the money. However, he chose humour and light-heartedness. That single choice created a feeling of gratitude in me, gave me cause to smile during the day when the conversation randomly crossed my mind, and most importantly, made me wonder – Does my presence in other people’s lives spark a similar feeling? Or am I just… a necessary evil? We often confuse obligation with true appreciation. When someone shows up to a call with us, invites us for dinner, or reaches out to have a conversation, is it because they genuinely want to, or because they have to? Are they looking forward to that experience with us or really, they don’t have a choice? Well, I wondered. What group do I fall into? No cap, I too would love to be the reason someone smiles randomly during their day 🙈 This is business: Be realistic! Sometimes, you have to be a douchebag (or so we think) Exactly a month ago, our PM at Metrifox handed in her notice. She got another job and tripled her salary. I am genuinely proud of her. Today is her last day and I’m working on the agenda for our Friday catch-up, which we’re dedicating to bidding her farewell and celebrating her. Last week, I asked everyone to come prepared with their speeches. I’m sure someone will mention her pineapple fried rice… I digress. Preparing my speech caused me to think more about relational impact. Is she excited to be finally free of us? Or is she grateful for her time here? In the reverse too, am I grateful for her, or am I just relieved she’s someone else’s responsibility now? Sometime last month, an ex-colleague sent me a message about the company’s celebratory reaction to a co-worker’s announcement that they were leaving. But here’s the funny part: that person was incredibly effective at his job. He got shit done. His product analysis? Always solid. He came off as rude or brash sometimes, but honestly, whenever I was in meetings with him, I knew I had to bring my A-game and mediocrity wouldn’t fly. Thinking again about my PM who’s leaving. Yes, I’ve disagreed with her on quite a number of occasions. This is business. I’m not here to protect feelings; I’m here to make sure we thrive, not merely stay afloat. But is there a middle ground? Is there a way to be firm, demand excellence, be a no-nonsense person, and… not be a douche bag? Or should I just accept that leadership requires being the necessary evil more often than not and that’s okay? Is there a world where despite our disagreements, she still leaves grateful for our interactions? Ermmmm…. I like to believe there is. And if that’s not the case yet, that only means I haven’t found that balance. The onus is on me to find it if I want to build a company that truly thrives. To me, thriving isn’t just about making money, it’s about making money with people who genuinely want to keep making that money with you, because working with you leaves their day better in many ways. Who cares about being liked? There’s every possibility that after reading this piece, someone would start thinking, “Okay… so how do I become more likeable?” Please don’t! This has nothing to do with being liked. And that’s exactly why my next piece is going to be about the counterfeit currency of being liked. If you’d like to be notified, well… you know what to do 👇🏾 This is about adding a sprinkle of sunlight to the days of those you interact with. Becoming the kind of person who naturally brings something to the table in a way that inspires others to grow or genuinely makes their burden lighter, without….. you guessed right…being a douchebag. You can do all of the above and more, and still not be liked. The human race is funny like that. You can’t afford to count on affection as the measure of your impact. Affection is soooo unpredictable! Mmmmm… that sounded so good we need to make it a quote! Affection is so unpredictable, you can’t afford to count on it as the measure of your impact. Abiodun Olowode, Nov 2025 Instead, be more conscious in your interactions. Work towards leaving people in a better state than you met them (or at least don’t leave them worse 🫠). In some cases, this would require you telling a painful truth in the gentlest way possible (I’m still working on this 😂), and that’s okay. We can do this! 💪🏾 ’Til next week (my subscribers know why that’s crossed out 🙃). Don’t be a douchebag 👋🏾

  

• Who puts rice in a pineapple?

  Nov 14 ⎯ I did say to myself in the 1st week of September, after the launch of Metrifox that I’ll make a Youtube video every week to document my journey as CTO and Co-founder. Oh, how easy that was! Guess how many videos I’ve made so far? Two!!! 🙈. I made the first one that week talking about the 8hr call before the Metrifox launch, and the second one a month later, talking about my Budapest/Bucharest airport saga. I swear, I thought it will be easy to do. In my head, all I had to do was take my phone, hit the record button and say my piece as to what was going on that week with us. Who needed to do a retake? I wouldn’t need to appear really good on camera, after all this wasn’t a fashion show. And because I want to be honest and sincere, we won’t be making any cuts. Just a truly unfiltered video about life as a builder. Oh, how wrong I was! Between meetings with engineers and the product team, trying to iterate fast, serving as the core backend engineer, hopping on calls with potential clients who want custom pricing breakdowns and endless features, and having two kids to care for… making a video about my week quickly became the last thing on my mind. Mind you, this is not the first time I’d try to start making Youtube videos and fail woefully. I tried about a year ago, but the work required was just too much I quit. Yeah right, you can say I’m just making excuses and I was never really a serious person (maybe you’re right). But hey, when I give excuses, it’s fine, but when someone else does, it’s sheer incompetence. The world is not fair, I know, don’t blame me for it 🌚 Why are we even here? Because writing is so much easier!! You don’t have to look “presentable”. You don’t have to redo the whole thing if something doesn’t come out right (thank you, backspace). You don’t have to make sure you get it right the first time. Brah, you can always edit after publishing, and if it’s so bad, then you can just hide the piece 😂 So, what have I been up to? The funny thing is my weeks are often so crazy I can’t remember what I did at the start of the week. Nevertheless, every Friday, we have our catch-up meetings where we play games, have fun and try to decompress. Recently, I started a new challenge: two team members cook a meal, send me pictures before the call, and everyone else votes for which one looks tastier. And yes, we vote purely based on appearance! What? How else would you suggest we voted? You want us to visit their homes and taste it? No thanks, I’d rather not risk catching diarrhoea on my way home 😭 The Fried Rice Challenge Last week, the chosen dish was fried rice. When I received the pictures, I was stunned! Wait what? Who brings a bazooka to a knife fight? Y’all be taking this thing to a whole new level. This challenge was dishing out no medals, I didn’t think it was this serious! I know you’re wondering, “Why is AB being so dramatic?”. Well, you will too when you see the photo. Someone put the rice in a pineapple!! A pineapple 🍍!! At first I thought it was a pineapple shaped plate, and then I looked more closely and lo and behold, it was a real pineapple. It was at that point I remembered! The other contestant had bragged about being a “world class chef”. He said he didn’t think anyone could beat him. He was the chief of all delicacies, and cooking was his hobby. In that moment, I got it! When you’re faced with that kind of opponent, what do you do? You go the extra mile! You pull in a pineapple if you have to. You don’t make excuses like AB about why she can’t make videos. You do what no one expects you to do. Needless to say, she won! And by a landslide. I won’t even show you the other plate. 😂 My Pineapple Moment This is why I’m now going to do what no one expects me to do. I’m not going to sit here and pine (pun intended), when I can just take action. I’m going to ask you to subscribe to my newsletter 👇🏾 This is so I can keep you updated on what’s happening with me and Metrifox, even though this is my first post in a long while and you absolutely have no idea if I’m going to keep up with this, or ghost you for another 3 months 🤪 But hey, that’s part of the fun! ’Til next time, adios 👋🏾

  

• The Trap of Safety

  Nov 07 ⎯ I ask more questions than I draw conclusions, so prepare yourself, this post might just end up being a web of unending questions. Nevertheless, I honestly think questions make us think critically, observe the norms, assess our priorities, fears and insecurities, as well as reflect on life in general. Talking about reflections, let’s take a ride! Many a time, we’re comfortable, everything is working, we’re probably exactly where 5 years ago, we dreamed we’ll be, we can say for certain that we’re safe. Damn! We have the life we’ve always wanted, but why have we begun to feel lately like we’re just going through the motions? Should we be somewhere different? Why does it feel like the light within us keeps dimming? Why do we have to work so hard to ignite the passion that once drove us like we were an electric powered car? What did we miss, where did we miss it and how can we get it back? These kinds of thoughts are likely to lead us to much deeper and important questions like: Why are we not ready to do something about it? When we want to do something about it, why is our first thought to try harder at the same thing? Could it be because we’re safe here? Look, nothing is really truly broken, why would anyone want to start afresh? Did we want what we should want, not what we really deeply wanted?, and now that we’ve got it, we’re miserable? Was the joy we had short-lived because it came from the achievement of a goal, not from a deep sense of fulfilment? Mmmmmm, questions, questions, questions! Let’s talk about safety. Many of us like predictability, we like that we know exactly what’s going to happen and when its going to happen, and this gives us stability, and in turn makes us feel safe. We then go ahead and prioritize this stability over true joy. We say “this is supposed to make me happy”, and we intend that by saying it, it will make us happy. What a joke! I’m not going against the fact that for some, achieving this stability does bring joy, and going through the motions is exactly what they live for. For some others though, this is not the case! There’s a burning desire within to do something different, be somewhere different, explore the depths of a calling towards something that really fulfils them, and even though they have stability where they are, it ends up not being enough. For these folks, safety has become a trap. The fact that they can say “it’s safe here”, prevents them from going elsewhere. They give excuses like “Can’t you see how old I am?”, “I have achieved a lot here, it will be stupid to go off and do my own thing!”, “I built something beautiful here and even though it doesn’t serve my joy anymore, I love my legacy, and so I’ll stick with it!”, “Damn! This pays the bills”. Think about the painter who never went painting because he had a WallStreet job that paid his bills, even though he hated it. The singer who never sang because, well, they’re a software developer and they have a family to care for. The builder who never went on to bricklaying because he flies planes and it’s a pretty cool job with lots of prestige. Did they sacrifice exhilarating joy and boundless fulfilment just so they could play it safe? At the end of their lives, would they be satisfied and proud, beating their chests at a job well done, or asking “What if ?” Honestly, I don’t know. Sometimes, the sacrifice is worth it, and sometimes it’s not. The most important thing is that we’re asking the question “Is it really cozy here, or am I trapped?”. A cat in a cozy cage