I Did That Shit: The Boring Bits

Last week, I ended the post at the exact moment any reasonable person would have continued.

Yes, I know. Yes, it was wicked. No, I am not sorry.

If you came here today expecting a neat 7-step routine, a secret supplement stack, or a heroic little story where discipline always defeats desire, I may disappoint you.

This story will play you no plays, offer you no offerings, and sell you no secrets. It’s more like a boring bowl of bananas.

Dang! Why did I choose bananas? I don’t know. It just felt right.

Anyways, here are the boring bits: I walked more, lifted sometimes, ate more protein, kept useful things visible, and made my family part of the plot.

Analyzing My Results

Body Fat Percentage

According to science, the optimal body fat percentage for women is between 21% and 24%. My first scan showed I was at 26.1%.

Of course, this wasn’t bad at all. The radiologist said I was at a perfectly fine percentage and didn’t need to bother about it. Also, I’m tired of writing “radiologist,” so from here on, the first one is Mr. F and the second one is Mr. S.

Mr F’s submission didn’t stop me from hoping that my next scan would show a drop towards the optimal range. I didn’t understand how I was going to achieve that eating more as he had advised. Well, as seen below, we went down by about 2%. Some fat disappeared from my arms and legs.

I’d attribute a huge chunk of the fat lost in my legs to walking. I started out trying to hit 10k steps daily. I’d use my walking pad which is stationed under my desk to rake the steps in. But then, something strange happened, I got wooed. I’m not kidding.

I fell for the cool breeze that would kiss my face as I left my house. It brushed through my hair and made my scalp feel awake. The music in my ears made it easy to forget myself as I was lost in the embrace of nature. The truth is I got obsessed and I began to find every reason to stay outside like a girl who had found a new lover.

At 6am, I’d head out. It didn’t need me to look perfect. It just needed me to show up. And show up I did. I’d be walking for about 45-60 mins in the morning. When I go to drop the kids at school, I’d take the longest path back and that’d keep me out for about another 45 mins. And then I’d be out in the afternoon to pick them up. At the end of the day, I began to average at least 15k steps per day. Below is my step count for last week.

Lean Asymmetry

This one was tricky. The results had shown that my right side (especially on my arms) had way more muscle than my left side. The asymmetry was not asymmetrying.

I was a little bothered by this as the percentage for my arms was in the suboptimal range. I began to pick things up with my left hand all the time. Everything I would naturally carry with my right hand, I carried with my left. I took the trash out with my left hand. I moved my walking pad with my left hand. I couldn’t carry the kids with my left hand alone but not for lack of trying.

I lifted my weights more with my left than with my right. This was Mr. F’s advice: let the left side set the limit. If I could only do 4 reps with my left, my right had no business doing 5.

Anyways, it worked! And maybe too well. The change was quite unbelievable. Arms went from 15.3% to 4.4%, taking me to the optimal asymetry range. I did not see that coming.

Bone Density

My bone density wasn’t looking good.

Mr. F prescribed the usual suspects: milk, calcium, D3, lifting weights, and a few other things I probably should have paid attention to but didn’t, because I was busy wondering how my bones and I got here in the first place.

At the time, I blamed genetics. Convenient, I know. I also told myself I couldn’t fix everything at once, so I’d focus on building muscle and hope my bones got the memo.

To up my protein, I added Greek yoghurt to my staple foods. Maybe it helped, who knows?

I also started lifting weights. Not just my 8kg dumbbells but also my body weight. I did pushups as often as I could and even came up with a theorem as a result. A few times a week, I lifted my dumbbells from my shoulders to above my head, for however many reps I could manage. I also squatted while holding them.

The results seem to suggest these things worked well. I moved from suboptimal to average. My back saw some huge jumps. Maybe it’s the pullups I didn’t mention. My son decided he wants to become a bodybuilder (I don’t know why), and he does pullups often. I see the bar when going into my room and sometimes pull myself up 2 to 3 times. I don’t know if that helped.

If you’re surprised about these results, you’re not alone. Maybe the machine was faulty that day and just churning out numbers. Who knows?

Lean Mass

This is a mixture of good and bad news. Yes, I did gain muscle but I’m not out of the suboptimal range yet. That should tell you how bad it was before. I have another scan at the end of the year, so in another 6 months from now, I hope to be in the average range.

What Actually Helped

I did not achieve this because I’m very disciplined. I’d say it was because I had systems that helped me.

• People: I recruited my family in this business of gaining muscle. They’d ask when I was going for my walk, celebrate with me when I did more pushups than the last time, and send me videos to motivate me when necessary.

• Visibility: My dumbbells are right in my face. I see them when I walk into the room. I see them when I’m sitting on my bed. I see them when I turn around from my work desk. This was intentional. I kept them where it would be easy to just pick up and get a squat or a lift in.

• Routine: My walking path home isn’t the straight path anymore. My body knows the longer route now. I make the turns without thinking, like a reflex action. Also, when I get up from bed in the morning, I hit the floor for pushups. No ceremony. No preparation. Just wake, drop, push. Somehow, it has become part of the waking up process.

• Easy Access: I always have my 0% fat Greek yoghurt and blueberries in my fridge. Whenever the sweet tooth raged, I mixed them up in a cup and pretended it was icecream. This meant that even when I was really hungry and needed a quick snack, I had something to munch on while preparing a reasonable meal. If I didn’t have this, I’d be eating stuff that wouldn’t help me achieve my goals. We didn’t want that.

• YOLO: This is an acronym for “You only live once”. I took ice cream, ate kebab and stuff sometimes. What’s life without a little enjoyment here and there? A boring banana I suppose 😬

Damn. This was a long write and probably an even longer read.

I have no grand motivation for you this week. Just a few boring things that became slightly less boring because I kept doing them.

Stay safe. Try not to have a banana week.

Oooopsie. I did it again.